Reliable Fake News. "Shitty Onion"
LOS ANGELES, CA – For the fee of $20,000, Jack Stipman had his entire day narrated by actor Morgan Freeman. According to the contract, from the time Stipman woke up, Morgan Freeman would narrate every one of Stipman’s daily activities.
In the morning, Jack Stipman headed to the bathroom while Morgan Freeman sat, wearing glasses, and narrated: “At that time, it seemed the bathroom was the right idea and maybe take a quick shower. Showers are a funny thing; a bit like life. The water pours down and you can feel it hit you like the sunshine from that day 15 years ago with Shelly.” Freeman’s low-pitched, caring voice said. Stipman said that experience was a lovely addition to his day.
“I really thought it was worth the money. He even threw in some great movie-score music to fit the scenario,” Stipman told us.
Morgan Freeman would follow Stipman throughout his day. Stipman descibed giving money to a homeless man on the sidewalk when, all of the sudden, orchestral strings could be heard and Morgan Freeman said,” Giving is what it’s all about.” The moment brought a tear to Stipman’s eye.
“I would recommend this to anyone,” Stipman said. “And he meant it, just like he said,” Morgan Freeman added.