Word Rat

Reliable Fake News. "Shitty Onion"

Man Starves to Death Waiting for Girlfriend to Get Ready

LEWISTON, ME – Twenty-four year old Devin Carter starved to death recently while waiting for his girlfriend to get ready to go out.  skeleton

Carter and his girlfriend had planned to go to T.G.I.Friday’s and see a movie later that night.  Carter showed up to his girlfriend’s house and reportedly, never saw the outside world again.

Carter showed up to the house of Barbara Powell, who was reportedly with her family in their summer home in Florida. Carter had walked in the house and sat down on the couch holding flowers for her.  It is unclear as to why he simply didn’t leave after a given amount of time.

“I haven’t spoken to Devin Carter in months,” Barbara told us, “why was he at my other home?”  This is a mystery that has yet to be solved.

Devin Carter’s father told us that Devin was always complaining about women “taking too long to get ready.” He told us “Devin probably thought she was just about too finish any minute, but then it was too late.”

 

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This entry was posted on April 16, 2013 by in Community.
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