Word Rat

Reliable Fake News. "Shitty Onion"

Breaking: Biden Buying Beanie Babies with Taxpayer Bucks

WASHINGTON D.C. – Vice President Joe Biden has been spending work hours and taxpayer money buying Ty Beanie Babies, according to reports.  Biden bought nearly 800,000 Beanie Babies with taxpayer money, claiming the Beanie Babies were a “wise investment.”beanie

In what is being called Beanie-Gate, an investigative reporting effort found that Joe Biden spend hundreds of thousands of dollars buying Beanie Babies when he should have been dealing with the IRS scandal, the Benghazi scandal, and other things that vice presidents do.  Biden says he’d just much rather collect Beanie Babies, and he “won’t deny it.”

“They’re so cute.  They come with names and are full of beans!  Don’t take the tag off!”  Biden insisted.  According to Biden, whether or not the tag stays in tact is crucial for resale value.

Obama says while he hopes that Biden spend taxpayer money more wisely, he can’t deny that the Beanie Babies are adorable.

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This entry was posted on May 29, 2013 by in Politics, Pop-Culture.
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